Most entries are like friends only.
Sorry I'm paranoid now.

You know the drill.
Comment, tell me where you're from (:

<3 

Reply to this meme by yelling "Words!" and I will give you five words that remind me of you. Then post them in your LJ and explain what they mean to you.
I was given birmingham, clubbing, boys, tongue piercing & london by nightdances_x

Birmingham - My future city for the next 4 years, well technically 3 as i'll be abroad for one year but whatever. I am SO excited to be moving, it seems like I've waited forever to escape London, London isn't actually that bad but when I was younger I just hated it but now that I've grown it's all fun but I like change and really do want to be living away from home. I chose Birmingham mainly because of the Uni but it is also the second city, I doubt it will differ from London but new faces and new things will make it exciting. Birmingham really represents to me the chance to live my life with nothing (parents) to hold me back I think I'll be able to get myself some help and enjoy myself without having to worry about what my parents will say, more specifically my mother because I do worry a lot about what she thinks and what she says. So Birmingham is sort of my saving grace so it better be good!

Clubbing - I love clubbing! I love to dance and I used to love to drink so clubbing is just made for me. Now that I don't get drunk I still club a lot and it's still so much fun and cheaper! I love going to clubs so much more than going to pubs because I like the atmosphere of clubs, even though there is usually a lot of shouting! Like I said dancing is fun and you meet interesting people at clubs, most of the time they're annoying but every club is an experience. I went clubbing on Saturday in a place called Strawberry Moons (i think) for a friends 21st birthday and the club is full of people like 24 and so and it was so weird because i'm used to going to clubs where there are mixtures of ages!

Boys - Urgh, boys will be the death of me but somehow I can't seem to escape them or want to escape them! Birmingham gives me a fresh start to make new mistakes with new boys =P I think about all the boys I've been in touch with in the past and I figure for the most part I just settle because at first I didn't and then let someone special go and yeah. Boys are so complicated, honestly have made me considered batting for the other team, haha. Right now I figure getting involved with boys when I'm moving away isn't fair to them or me. I certainly plan to enjoy myself when I go to uni. I do miss Jack loads though but somethings can't be helped!

Tongue piercing - I love my piercing although it's chipped two of my teeth and made it so when I drink really hot stuff or really cold stuff one tooth hurts but that's getting sorted. I've always wanted to get my tongue pierced I had plans for it but they all just fell through. Then I forgot about it and then when my friend suggested getting it done because she knew I'd wanted it I just went along and did it. I remember it was around the time Jack and I broke up so I was like "fuck life". Getting it done didn't hurt but I made my friend go first and I couldn't look which is weird because I'm not scared of needles. What hurt the most was the numbing pain for five days after and not being able to eat without pain! I think I sucked my bodys weight worth of ice and I forced myself to eat because I am a girl who loves her food! When I got it done though the ball was so big and heavy for my tongue I sounded like I had a lisp but now it's smaller and I love the piercing although I know I will take it out eventually as it has chipped TWO maybe three teeth and it's not fun!

London - London means a lot to me and I am leaving it behind but really I know i'll be coming back every 2 months or so and then for the summer so I'm not sad about leaving. I'm confident I'll stay in touch with the people I want and I will force people to come up and see me. London itself is certainly more fun now that my parents aren't so protective over me. If I had unlimited amounts of money London would be even more fun. One thing I love about London is the fashion and living in Camden everything is crazy and I love wearing whatever I want without caring because everyone is so expressive! Smaller towns are not like that at all! London certainly has a lot to offer and is home but I am glad to moving onnnnnnn.

stolen from crouchea 
fill it out so i can know more about you i guess lol.
I'm off right now to Jacks and staying the night and tomorrow night I'm going to a friends house jam thing, so I basically won't be online until sunday so I'll respond then! Have a good weekend every one :)

1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of LJ?
10. What's your philosophy on life?
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
13. What is your favorite memory of us?
14. What is your favorite guilty pleasure?
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the 'world peace etc' malarky) - what are they?
17. Can we get together and make a cake?
18. Which country is your spiritual home?
19. What is your big weakness?
20. Do you think I'm a good person?
21. What was your best/favorite subject at school?
22. Describe your accent
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
24. What do you wear to sleep?
25. Trousers or skirts?
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together? (If you have no idea, just say something crazy/entertaining!)
28. Will you repost this so I can fill it out for you?

I appreciate the fact that people fought for me to vote and I know with the power to vote I should vote in hope (little hope) of being able to change what I don't like about this country.
Here is the dilemma.
I know nothing about politics and any spare time I have is for revision not brushing up on the government and really things I count as nothing to do with me. I've been active on the HOPE not hate campaign that is against the British National Party gaining a seat in the election thingy, apart from that I haven't really taken any other initiative.
Point is I think I've done my bit because I don't want to vote and cast a rubbish vote. It's not that important to me and to be honest I think I'm too self centered to be active about what I don't like in the world because right now all I can think about is my exams and then summer I honestly right now can't think of what I don't like about the country I live in, like I mean serious issues.
So I will take it upon myself in the next four years to gain knowledge and background on politics and then cast a good vote.
I feel I have to justify myself you see.

First exam tomorrow, I am prepared and I've had a bunch of positive essays back from my teacher so I do hope it goes really well tomorrow. Today I did some revision, went into school got the essays back then went to media to do some work and now I am in a better place with my media, but I need to speed it up.
Yesterday I went to camden high street with my mum, we had lunch and then she got a new phone because of the upgrade on her contract and it was nice strolling around with her. I just wanted to say that because I'll probably forget that day but I shouldn't because we had a good time.

countdown: 13 days!


p.s i have this twitter thing y'know...

Only a few because my camera deleted a whole bunch, I really do need a new camera...

( all the things you want in life, just ask for them )


I wasn't expecting any presents. Becky got me a top. Jojo got me perfume. I was so touched my Jojo's present random as it sounds because I wasn't expecting one at all and it turned out to be so throughtful in my opinion. I was home by 11! I'm 18 and still sensible but I was TIRED. A really good night nevertheless :)

stolen from crouchea
1. Think of the first word that comes to mind when you think of me.
2. Go to Google Images and search for that word.
3. Reply to this post with one of the pictures on the first page of results. (DON'T TELL ME THE WORD!)
4. Put this in your own journal so that I can do the same.

I gots a job!
Finally finally finally.
It's in Primark of all places but yaaaaaaaaaay.
Going pub tonight and now I have something to be happy for/celebrate.
Either you know I still would have drank myself silly.
Yay yay!

hey hey hey.
i decided not to be a grinch about things and enjoy the snow, despite the fact that i woke up and there was no school.
but i'm happy because no school photos :) 
( spread legs, not lies. )

Books
1 - Second Glance - Jodi Picoult
2 - The Godfather - Mario Puzo
3 - 1984 - George Orwell
4 - The Notebook - Nicholas Sparks
5 - Bitter Chocolate - Lesley Lokko
6 - The Dice Man - Luke Rhinehart
7 - Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
8 - So Many Ways To Begin - Jon McGregor
9 - No One Belong Here More Than You - Miranda July
10 - Invisble Monsters - Chuck Palahniuk
11 - Running with Scissors - Augusten Burroughs
12 - The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas - John Boyne
13 - The Edible Women - Margaret Atwood
14 - The Five People you Meet in Heaven - Mitch Albom
15 - Snakes and Earrings - Hitomi Kanehara
16 - Looking for Alaska - John Green
17 - Norwegian Wood - Haruki Marakami
18 - The Alchemist - Paulo Coelho
19 - On The Road - Jack Kerouc
20 - Extremely Loud&Incredibly Close - Jonathan Safran Foer
21 - The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle - Haruki Marakami


Films
1 - Trainspotting (most of it anyway)
2 - Bride Wars
3 - He's just not that into you
4 - This is England
5 - Teeth (OH MY FUCKING LOL)
6 - The Dark Crystal
7 - My Beautiful Laundrette
8 - The Shawshank Redemption
9 - The Fast and the Furious (the old one not the new one. VIN DIESEL & PAUL WALKER are such good eye candy!)
10 - XXX
11 - Kung Fu Panda
12 - Night At The Museum 2
13 - Jumper
14 - Marie Antoinette
15 - Me Without You
16 - My Sister's Keeper
17 - Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
18 - The Hangover
19 - The Time Traveller's Wife
20 - Across the Universe
21 - Heathers
22 - Twilight
23 - Blood Diamond

Bands/Acts seen live
1 - Emarosa
2 - The Spill Canvas
3 - You Me At Six (2)
4 - Black Milk + Elzhi
5 - New Found Glory
6 - Jack's Mannequin
7 - The Deftones
8 - Fall Out Boy
9 - Placebo
10 - Alexisonfire
11 - Kaiser Chiefs
12 - Anti Flag
13 - Kings of Leon
14 - Billy Talent
15 - Faith No More
16 - Enter Shakari
17 - The Courteeners
18 - Prodigy
19 - Arctic Monkey
20 - Gossip
21 - Kids in Glass Houses
22 - Noah and the Whale
23 - The Living End
24 - The View
25 - Brand New
26 - Lostphrophets
29 - The Party After
30 - Tell it to the Marines
31 - Burn so Bright
32 - They Sink Ships
33 - We Sunk Atlantis
34 - Giants
35 - Master Shortie
36 - Chipmunk
37 - Mr Hudson

GOT AN OFFER FOR ASTON UNI!



( yet I still haven't finished my business homework)!

My weeked begins today because I'm not going in tomorrow. I have no lesson and then I'd have to go to church. I didn't go in this morning either so I had the long loveliest sleep and didn't miss any lessons. We had parents evening on Monday, and I've missed two lessons of media which puts me down to 90%. My mother was like are you being serious, what a ridiculous system! Because in my 6th form 90% means they can kick you off the course. I just laughed, because the teachers missed two days and I never ever do anything in that lesson, so me going or not going doesn't mean I have any work to show for it. I hate that teacher.

Anyway, I'm going out to dinner tomorrow with Tazmin. It kind of ruins my healthy eating/no food, but I've been doing so well this week :) So now I''ve got a whole week off school but I haven't made any plans. Plus I have no money. I hate this, but I'm sure I'll get by. Actually thursday I have plans to go to lunch with Josie, I don't know how that will turn out or if i'll have the money but we'll see. Also sometime during the week or next saturday I'm suppose to be filming my media with Holly as I lugged the camera and tripod home with me. I can also spend my time learning the guitar, I started yesterday but half term is the perfect chance to give it my full attention, as I'm easily distracted. That actually sounds like a good plan, but it's certain I will get bored.

Comment and I'll give you a letter.
Then you have to list ten things you LOVE that begin with that letter.
Afterward, post this in your journal and give out some letters of your own.

ohmyitsmarylynn</lj>  gave me F, was actually quite hard!

1. food - love love love it. how can you not!
2. fiona apple - her song ugly girl got me through some tough times!
3. fort minor - amazing amazing.
4. free verse - how i love to write.
5. fuck - a word i use often
6. fun - who doesn't love fun :D
7. freedom - i am aching for it, being free makes me wild.
8. films - love them. my fav being eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. closer. thirteen. fight club. garden state. candy.
9. fags - haha i'm so cheating, but cigarettes are love, they make me feel good. sometimes.
and this isn't something i love but it's an f
10. failure - my biggest fear. just to be a failure which is pretty much my life, but i mean on a much bigger scale.

i'm contemplating whether I should get this jab that prevents some form of cervical cancer. But idk, my mum said no and loads of people have said that it hasn't been tested on a lot of people so the side affects aren't really know. Tamar thinks I should do it, because it does work but only if you don't have sex within the next 6 months. And idk I plan on doing so, so ha. Tbh knowing my luck I'll get bad side effects or in the future I'll get cervical cancer. Well that's contemplating over. I do think we try to control things too much.

I'm so hungry.

I thought I would just picture spam this entry because it's nearly the end of summer and I have nothing else to say. Apart from the fact that I am dying, I NEED to see a dentist however can only see one on Monday. It could be my wisdom teeth but I have no idea. A bit of gum fell out my mouth today.



SEE.
sorry that is really gross.

Aside from this I made cakes today, well sort of cakes thingy. Although I can't actually eat them because it hurts to fucking eat, so I made my brother test them out. I have this recipe I want to try out, I can't wait until my mouth is fucking sorted.

I keep forgetting to write anything in this journal, I remember I used to be SO obessed with writing everything down, keeping little things just so I would remember everything. But over the past three years I just haven't cared and I feel it more lately. I don't really care if I don't rememeber how the world passed me by, everything is slipping away and I just realise I don't even give a shit.

Also I think Josie may be angry at me, but to be honest it's nicer if I speak my mind and even if she does what she wants, which she obviously will do, at least everything would be out in the open. Basically she wants to drop out of 6th form and go college to do some counselling degree. Which I just think is all very long, because then she'd already have wasted a year and then will have to spend two years at school again. When she can just pick up some subject get points for the subject she wants to do and then go to uni. Fair enough the course she'll do in collage is more of what she wants to do, but its one of those shit thing for people who can't really be bothered if you get me, the kind of thing people look down on. But oh well I said my bit, it's totally up to her what she does really. Like I feel bad I won't see her in college or anything but to be honest I never really did, so it's not like it would be any different. Blah I want to be in Uni now, away from everyonee. I seriously need a fresh start.

( that's what you get when you let your heart win. )




Now I'm stuck as to what my next hair style should be.
I haven't heard back from the interview :/
My dermatologist appointment is on the 4th :D


This is my longest entry EVER.